I am here.

So.. I haven't posted in almost a week. I have had a few.. hectic mornings.. but for the most part... I just haven't really felt like posting.  I'm at odds with the way I feel about that..  On one hand, I feel that it needs to be a regular therapy..sort of like a daily bath.. a cleansing of the soul perhaps.  On the other hand.. I don't think it should be a chore.. something to do for the sake of just.. blogging. I'm certain there's a happy medium in there somewhere. I said that I haven't felt like posting.. I suppose, at times, I have... I just don't really know what I want to get out of my system.  I have people in my life.. that support me.. but it seems like many people are involved in their own life.. and some are distancing themselves from me.  I completely understand it if someone feels the need to do that.. but I am not chasing anyone out of my life.. nor do I want anyone to leave. It does irritate me somewhat when people feel the need to take things out of context then put their own spin on it. I suppose I've even done that.. but I will try to see things from other's viewpoints.  I enjoy my life.. and the way that it is going.  There are many positive aspects.. and possibilities... I don't forget my past.. nor those people who have supported me.. they continue to retain a place in my heart.  I don't know what people want from me for the most part.. but I am not even certain they know what they want from themselves... or for themselves.  I enjoy my interaction with my friends.. but a lot of things happen in our daily lives that we don't have a clue about... that's just the nature of things..  Sure... I know the major events in their lives.. but.. what about all of the supporting elements in our lives.. in most instances... we only know about others.. what they choose to tell us.. or share.. It's very difficult to develop or maintain a close friendship online.. and if not careful.. people will drift apart.. even to the point where they become almost like strangers.   We develop a knowledge about the character of others.. and most times, that is why we develop friendships.  Relationships.. especially those found online can be in a constant state of flux.  We don't get the body language that we get from being face to face with an individual... That doesn't mean we can't develop even stronger friendships.. it just means that the dynamics are somewhat different.   I have a few people in my life that I can actually call a friend.. and if needed I would do everything in my power to support them. But I can never propagate both sides of a friendship.. I will do all I can to maintain who I am.. and hopefully others will continue to see me for the person I am inside.  One of my dearest friends recently said... true friendship.. is being able to spend a little time away.. and picking right back up where you left off.. I am in complete agreement with that statement...  When my friend need me...or want me to be a part of their lives.... I am here.

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