It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas.

I'm on my 16 day break now... first day off and it was really a good one.  Of course now things seem to be falling into place. I always seemed to have a few reservations... it's difficult not to be a bit pessimistic after all the things I've come through... but it is getting much easier to look at the positive side of things now... especially when you don't do thing based on others... at least not the basic things... I do things for my daughters.. that much is true.. and I always will.. but I won't let any one factor control my life.  I always take into account the consequences.. but it's almost as though sometimes I am outside of my life... looking in... I've made so many mistakes, that I'm certain at times I will make others... and that's all a part of the journey... I am thankful for my mistakes as well as my victories... I've accomplished quite a bit in my life.. and if it were to be over tomorrow, I think it balances out to a good life lived.  I don't plan on going any time soon... but there's always that chance.  I am thankful for those that have stuck with me in my journey... for they have been ones I've been able to count on for support... we all need that... and I've had a few to provide just that. There are others that come into and go out of my life... and as with anyone else... I'm sure they had their purpose for being there... as everything has gone into making who and what I am now...but my daughters... even my soon-to-be-ex wife... will always be a part of my life... helping to shape it... and I appreciate them too.. They have shown me they want to be a part of it... and for that... I am truly thankful. We never know what we will run into around the next corner, but if we're not careful, it could be another lesson hard taught.  I'm hoping I'm done with those... at least for the most part.  I know there are billions of people on the planet I don't know... and will never have the chance to meet, but it's like sometimes I feel connected to everyone... Is that strange?  I feel like hugging every stranger on the street and saying that I understand... and that it will all be okay... I don't know why it comes to me like that... but it's a good feeling... and thankful feeling... maybe it's part of the holiday spirit infecting me with all of the yuletide cheer... I'm okay with that... it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas. 

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