There's More To Come.

I recently made a post in a forum on one of the sites I visited... the thread was titled "Jealousy and hurt feelings" It went like this:

I've been off and on this site for quite awhile... and only once that I can remember did I ever concurrently get intimate with more than one person at a time.. that was way back when I was a noob and didn't realize that the site was full of people who were here just seeking someone who would listen.. understand.. and perhaps identify with what was going on in their life. As weird as it sounds, I was monogamous in any relationship I was in.. because it was a place of refuge from my non-existent relationship with my now ex-spouse. I still say that there are a varying degree of interactions here and the main thing to avoid hurt feelings or jealousy is for anyone who choose to engage in those interactions to be on the same page... I can understand when people are stuck in a marriage that they cannot leave and no longer feel the need to validate or identify with that marriage... but if you tell someone something here... knowing full well what most have been through... and then you lie through your teeth about being committed to a "relationship" ...that makes you a pretty sorry individual. I am not speaking of anyone in particular with this post.. as it really doesn't apply to me... After a few years of trying to justify my actions here, I couldn't live with myself in terms of having integrity.. It isn't my place to judge others, and over the years, I've made many friends and acquaintances.. most of which are no longer here but after all the cheating I've seen here... not even with spouses.. but with online members who say they are involved with no one else.. I have developed a degree of cynicism that would be difficult to measure. I have had many members tell me about someone they were involved with... only to have another friend tell me they were involved with this same person. I try not to interact as much as I did at one time ... because it's a rampant activity here... and I hate getting caught up in the drama... I am pretty much out of the loop now.. which is a good thing... maybe someday I'll lose a bit of my cynical nature.. and I am pretty much oblivious to the current drama that I hear mention of... and relate in no uncertain terms that I don't want to know about it... I am certain it still exists now as much as it ever did... but if someone chooses to put themselves in that position, knowing what is a predominant occurrence, that makes them as much to blame as the other person in my book.

I address several things that sometimes make me question why I subject myself to such a poisonous environment... or for that matter, why anyone else would. I'm still working out things in my mind and hope to address it as I think it through... so there's more to come.