I Don't Actually Need A Whole Lot.
So... I'm up... the morning calls from Dad have been put back into place on my days off... I usually get one about 7 am or so. It's not all that bad as I'm usually up between 0430 and 0500 on the days I work. I just have to account for the fact that I'm not going to get to sleep late anymore and plan accordingly.
The person I'm "seeing" is in Ohio with her mom, brother and 2 of her 3 kids.. I call them all kids even though the oldest one is 28. I get to thinking about the age of my kids and they're cruising right along. Later this year they'll be 22 and 17. I sorta think about my age from time to time... I know there's so many things I wanted to accomplish by now, but it looks like I'm gonna have to start counting out a few of them. I went to a restaurant yesterday and was asked if I got the senior discount.... at 55. I said "Nooooo… not quite there yet, I'm only 53." I think somewhere along the way, I started worrying too much about things that didn't matter. I wanted to be in a different place in my life, but then things happened. I had a discussion with a friend about placement in life.. and relationships.. I said something that... being the off-the-cuff, wise sage that I am... sorta hit home with me. You have to work on yourself and take care of things you can.. If you're not happy with you... why should anyone else be. If you can't be stable and okay on your own... and you need to depend on someone else in order to be happy. Then what exactly are you bringing to a relationship....besides a drain on the other person. Take the time to spend on yourself. Focus on what you need to do to get where you need to be... without involving anyone else. When someone gets to that point... where they are an asset instead of a liability... then that person can choose to have someone to share things with... but to do so out of need... is just a disaster waiting to happen. We all have jumped into relationships thinking ...this is what I need in my life.. to help make it complete.. well.. if your life depends on someone else, you really don't have a life. I am not saying that a person shouldn't choose to share that life with someone else in some capacity. I'm only saying that people in your life should be a want... not a need. I think we sometimes confuse the two... I want a cushy job paying more money than I could ever spend.. I only need something that allows me to get the necessities.... and maybe a little more for the sake of mental and emotional health. I want a lot of things.. but when it comes down to it... I don't actually need a whole lot.
The person I'm "seeing" is in Ohio with her mom, brother and 2 of her 3 kids.. I call them all kids even though the oldest one is 28. I get to thinking about the age of my kids and they're cruising right along. Later this year they'll be 22 and 17. I sorta think about my age from time to time... I know there's so many things I wanted to accomplish by now, but it looks like I'm gonna have to start counting out a few of them. I went to a restaurant yesterday and was asked if I got the senior discount.... at 55. I said "Nooooo… not quite there yet, I'm only 53." I think somewhere along the way, I started worrying too much about things that didn't matter. I wanted to be in a different place in my life, but then things happened. I had a discussion with a friend about placement in life.. and relationships.. I said something that... being the off-the-cuff, wise sage that I am... sorta hit home with me. You have to work on yourself and take care of things you can.. If you're not happy with you... why should anyone else be. If you can't be stable and okay on your own... and you need to depend on someone else in order to be happy. Then what exactly are you bringing to a relationship....besides a drain on the other person. Take the time to spend on yourself. Focus on what you need to do to get where you need to be... without involving anyone else. When someone gets to that point... where they are an asset instead of a liability... then that person can choose to have someone to share things with... but to do so out of need... is just a disaster waiting to happen. We all have jumped into relationships thinking ...this is what I need in my life.. to help make it complete.. well.. if your life depends on someone else, you really don't have a life. I am not saying that a person shouldn't choose to share that life with someone else in some capacity. I'm only saying that people in your life should be a want... not a need. I think we sometimes confuse the two... I want a cushy job paying more money than I could ever spend.. I only need something that allows me to get the necessities.... and maybe a little more for the sake of mental and emotional health. I want a lot of things.. but when it comes down to it... I don't actually need a whole lot.
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