I'm Due.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning... I'm letting my last evaluation get to me more than I realize.. it's bothering me this morning to the point where I have come up with a plan... my current supervisor has to do my midyear eval in a few months... if she's not late again.. I am going to submit one question to be included in my evaluation... according to regulations, I have that right... "Last year, when my evaluation was done, by the measurement system in place, I was running at 132.1% of my goals... which made me the 12th ranked trade of all trades on any center in the nation. On top of that, I had served over 30 days as acting vocational manager in the absence of one on center. I served as the coordinator for the new student record keeping program at the request of the center director. I was the backup IT point of contact to help resolve computer issues with all staff on center. I spent at least one day each month providing community service in assisting with the food commodities distribution with the help of my class, as well as many other duties outside my regular scope of work for the benefit of the center ....so my question is... according to my rating, all of this did not put my evaluation at anything beyond 'meets expectations' in any category.... what is required of me for you award me with a higher rating.. beyond the effort I had put forth?" I'm thinking my evaluation will wind up getting lost... or at least this question will... as I am certain this can't be documented. No one wants anything documented that will describe the incompetency level at this center. I'm almost certain I will end up stirring a bee's nest... but at this point I don't really care. I am working to make certain I am doing my job as diligently as I can... and that will be it.
So... I took advantage of getting up early... I fixed breakfast... spent 10 minutes on the exercise bike.. had my bath.. and now.. I'm blogging with all my clothes laid out on my bed ready to put on.... and I still don't leave for at least another hour and 15 to 30 minutes. I'm way ahead of schedule and I feel good about it. For some reason... when I do things I know I'm supposed to do... I get an awesome feeling... like exercising... and getting my weight under control... but then I forget that feeling and fall back into bad habits... I'm wondering if most people are like that. I keep sight of my motivation factor though... and it is getting closer and closer to a reality. Sometimes we get a setback in our goals.... but that should just make us try harder... especially when we know our goals are close to being within reach. I haven't let up on my job search... but this week has been more sporadic as I have had a busy week and been somewhat sick... but I'm hoping to make up for that this weekend. I hope to continue to be inundated with this much motivation... it really is a good thing and makes me in a much better mood. I still get irritated with my dad... but that is something that will probably never change... he called me 9 times on my way home last night... basically because I couldn't answer... I was on the phone with the fleet manager of our center talking about procedures for the shuttle bus I was driving yesterday... when I finally got home... from my 15 minute trip... he said he was afraid I had stalled out and was freezing... I told him that I thought I had enough sense to call someone if that happened... but his response was "I know you do... I just worry." I honestly think he has a serious control issue... if he can't be in control of a situation... he freaks out... it's not only me though.. it's anyone of my sisters... or my sisters' kids that have to undergo the same thing... just not as regularly as I do... because I'm a bit farther away... therefore making it more difficult for him to play God... yes.. the sarcasm is there for a reason... he does that to me. You would think after almost 48 years, I would be used to it... but I don't think that will ever happen... and he does all kinds of things to try to get you indebted to him.. I don't feel indebted moreso than I would if he didn't do anything... he just doesn't get it.
I got some things out and am feeling much better this morning... I'm a happy camper and will be heading off to work in a bit... heck... I might even end up playing a game for a bit this morning.... I'm due.
So... I took advantage of getting up early... I fixed breakfast... spent 10 minutes on the exercise bike.. had my bath.. and now.. I'm blogging with all my clothes laid out on my bed ready to put on.... and I still don't leave for at least another hour and 15 to 30 minutes. I'm way ahead of schedule and I feel good about it. For some reason... when I do things I know I'm supposed to do... I get an awesome feeling... like exercising... and getting my weight under control... but then I forget that feeling and fall back into bad habits... I'm wondering if most people are like that. I keep sight of my motivation factor though... and it is getting closer and closer to a reality. Sometimes we get a setback in our goals.... but that should just make us try harder... especially when we know our goals are close to being within reach. I haven't let up on my job search... but this week has been more sporadic as I have had a busy week and been somewhat sick... but I'm hoping to make up for that this weekend. I hope to continue to be inundated with this much motivation... it really is a good thing and makes me in a much better mood. I still get irritated with my dad... but that is something that will probably never change... he called me 9 times on my way home last night... basically because I couldn't answer... I was on the phone with the fleet manager of our center talking about procedures for the shuttle bus I was driving yesterday... when I finally got home... from my 15 minute trip... he said he was afraid I had stalled out and was freezing... I told him that I thought I had enough sense to call someone if that happened... but his response was "I know you do... I just worry." I honestly think he has a serious control issue... if he can't be in control of a situation... he freaks out... it's not only me though.. it's anyone of my sisters... or my sisters' kids that have to undergo the same thing... just not as regularly as I do... because I'm a bit farther away... therefore making it more difficult for him to play God... yes.. the sarcasm is there for a reason... he does that to me. You would think after almost 48 years, I would be used to it... but I don't think that will ever happen... and he does all kinds of things to try to get you indebted to him.. I don't feel indebted moreso than I would if he didn't do anything... he just doesn't get it.
I got some things out and am feeling much better this morning... I'm a happy camper and will be heading off to work in a bit... heck... I might even end up playing a game for a bit this morning.... I'm due.
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