I'm On The Right Track

Lots of snow here... it's also my last day of work this year... luckily I got permission to telework it... I do actually plan on getting some work done. I found some old hard drives and put them into a drive reader yesterday... and I ran into a lot of old file... pictures I don't even remember... movie files... and now my song collection is vast. I put them all on a 12 TB drive I bought on Prime day. When I bought it, it was on a whim. I have a tendency to do that... If something is a great deal... and I think I might need it... at least before an expiration date, I stash it somewhere for future use. I do that with food too... but then I'll pull out a can I forgot I had and it expired like a year ago. I'm trying to work on improving my usage on stuff like that. Maybe I have a disease or something. I tend to be a bit of a hoarder... but then I watch the shows on TLC and realize I have nowhere near the problem they have. I keep buying more and more stuff, and rarely do I throw anything out. I have 16 pair of glasses that I can sort use.. most of them are broken, but I keep them... just in case. I have closets full of clothes I never wear... I have a couple of kilts and a monk robe... I bright purple suit.. I have 2 leather jackets, one of which is too heavy to wear except in extreme frigid conditions... I also picked up a dress coat at Bon Ton when it went out of business... the MSRP is $920... their price was originally $450... but when things went 90% off, I got it for $45... it's stuff like that... that causes me to get stuff I don't actually need. I have a pressure washer I've had for 2 years without taking it out of the box. I have 12 pieces of luggage.. 2 tents... 4 sleeping bags... I will never use all of that. When I finally pass on, there will be one hell of an auction. My kids won't want much of it... they have quite a bit of different lifestyles than me. I don't think they go out of the house more than 2 or 3 times a month, especially since CoVID hit. I would like to help them be more outgoing, but I gave up parental rights when I divorced... I just wanted them to be happy, and I knew their mom was much more engaged with them... I figured they would figure it out, and I would support in any way I could. My youngest turns 18 in 3 days... my oldest will be 22 in 9 days... I don't have to pay child support any more, but I do... and I will as long as they are staying in the same house as my ex. I am encouraging them to invest in their future, but they are comfortable not getting out in this environment. At some point, that will have to change. I'm hoping things will normalize and they will start living their lives a bit more independently. My ex has had 5 1/2 years to develop a working skill, but she is only working at a convenience store as a cook in the back... I'm sure she does more than cook, but at least she is doing something. I am pretty sure most of us could do much more with our lives than what we are doing, but it's really not my place to judge.. even though I suppose I do, anyway. I observe and disagree with how most people choose to live, because those people tend to complain about what they have and how life is going. I'm living proof that a person can put forth more effort and get to a point where they are mostly happy.. I'm not sure that anyone is completely happy. I am certain that a successful life is one where the ups far outweigh the downs... although I've said in the past that there is a balance... for each up.. there is a down. I guess it depends on where you set the median. If you raise the bars, the scale is much higher. I'm sure I've "settled" in some areas, but in others, I will continue to strive for improvement. By the time most people are my age, they're tired of pushing themselves for something better... I'm never giving up completely on several areas of my life. It's all a motivation factor. If I look at the big picture overall, I realize how lucky I am to have what I have... That doesn't mean I will coast for very long... I take breaks and sometimes backpedal on my opinions and outlooks, but that just means I am growing as a person. It's silly to hold on to ideas that will cause a negative influence in your life. I'm still learning that. I hope to be a better person tomorrow than I am today... and better today than I was yesterday. It's all about taking off little chunks of life and dealing with those as we can. I have complained in the past... I'm sure I will do so in the future, but for all the griping I have done, I can say with no hesitation, I'm on the right track.