You Can't Get There From Here.

Lately, it's gone from the frying pan and into the fire at work... It seems as though everyone is trying to fix all these superficial issues at our center just so we can look good by appearances only... That's what most people seem to do... I know I've said that people judge you based on appearances.. but that doesn't change what's going on deeper. it makes no difference what is actually happening.. Is that how most people live?  Is that how most people find happiness?  To live with things not being completely as they seem?   I've been doing it for a long time in my marriage.. and it's kept down issues with my daughters..  I suppose that's how people view relationships sometimes too... is it better to just settle for what you can have.. instead of going for what you want?  I suppose then it means being sad only part of the time.. when reality sets in... instead of never being happy.  But then you get down to the issue of ... is it just a bandage on a broken life? What's the difference between hiding behind falsehoods and false relationships... and using some other crutch... like drugs or alcohol...  but then you have to discuss the physical wear and tear on a person.. versus the emotional and psychological damage..  If a person lives a fantasy life... do they always look for better than reality?   I've known a lot of people in my time... most of which I've seen pretty miserable... but then I've seen them emotionally happy and very stable at times.   Sometimes I miss having that outlook.. that things are going to be wonderful.. and at times... I feel that it's just a moment away.. that something will happen.. and all will change in my life.... but I've almost given up hope that things will be good...at least one good thing will involve having to deal with more crap.. so then... am I needing to change my attitude?  I have to move forward with my life somehow.. and honestly, I dislike the feeling that everything I do makes no difference in the happiness I feel.  Sitting and waiting for something to happen.. is so passive.. and that's not like me.. that's not who I am.. I am getting to the point I was several years back.... when I saw possibilities... but no avenue to get to those possibilities..  There are nice areas we can live... but if there are no roads from here to there... how are we ever supposed to make our way to them.  We can just observe from a distance... or we can get involved in changing our living situation by building the road ourselves... It doesn't look like most people will be trying to get to the miserable section of town.. It makes me wonder about the old phrase... "if you can't beat them... join them"  what all does that refer to... and just how accurate are all these old cliches. I would suppose if a phrase has been around for a long time... someone somewhere must have tried them out.. and they held to be true... I mean... look at all the phrases that never made it... like ... "Put your tongue in an empty light socket for a pick-me up"   ...or "you get more flies with soap than honey"  who would say something and keep using the phrase.. even supporting it.. if there is no validity in it.   Of course then when thinking about going from the dark areas to the brighter future... one might argue... "You can't get there from here"