I've Got This.

I think I have a tendency to mentally browbeat myself.  I can get into a mood sometimes, and then I keep thinking " I have this" ...when I really don't.  I know a little bit about how the world works. I also know that most men are animalistic in nature... we let the ideas of passion and physical fantasies creep into our heads and then those thoughts sit there and grow until we do something about it. Most men I've met will do whatever it takes to get their basic needs met... sex, eating, drinking, sleep, and sometimes some form of entertainment.  Although, sex is usually the highest on the list as far as entertainment goes. I don't want to be like most men... but at times I still am.  I don't want to be of the caveman mentality where I club someone over the head and drag her back to my cave and have my way with her... first and foremost... that's illegal..  secondly, I can't really get into something where both people aren't on the same page... I've learned that even though it might be said... that isn't something that ever really happens. Everyone is different. No two people have the same idea of how an interaction should take place. That's why there are so many conflicts between men and women... both of them manipulate... women do it as more of a passive seduction... and men flat out lie.. really both methods are lying to achieve what one wants... but what really is that?  Hormones suck. I actually envy those people whose bodies don't scream at them to find some relief... I guess that's what masturbation is for, but that only goes so far.  The way of the world is that men and women are given a basic desire for procreation...  but the huge problem with that.. is that this desire causes so much internal and external conflict. I even expend too much energy thinking about how I can satiate this desire. But then my more developed portion of my cerebral cortex takes over and I understand how primitive I've become in my thinking.. and I bury the thoughts... Sometimes those thoughts creep out again, but I do a pretty good job of keeping them in check... it helps to direct the attention of those thoughts to targets who have no feasible way to take them seriously.. I suppose that's one of the main reasons I'm on the sites...

I got word on my house yesterday, finally... We close next Wednesday... I have to start getting my ass in gear and start packing... I'm thinking that and overtime will be taking up quite a bit of my time for the next few weeks... I hope it doesn't affect my blog time... but I'll be okay if it does. I have lots of things to set up and get prepared for my move.  I don't know when that's happening yet, but I'm not going to half-ass it... I'm still trying to figure out how I'm going to do all this by myself... but I'm sure I'll come up with something... I've got this.