So We Don't Feel Like We're So Alone.

So... it's 2:30 in the morning... and sleeps seems to elude me.. I don't know exactly what it is, but there is a lot weighing heavily on me... I thought once the house closed that would be a bit better, but it seems not to have made much difference.. I would say first and foremost is my job... I have all these deadlines to meet in a program that my management has hacked to bits as far as my outline.. and I'm meant to be able to come up with a productive program basically blindfolded with my hands tied behind me. The packet they want submitted doesn't include several things I recommended... so basically we're taking in students from other centers without any regard to how their behavior was... or how well they were doing... to me that is asinine. .. and I have only my deputy director to blame... She and I have to have a talk.  They want me to bring in more students than I can handle considering the fact that my other class is still well over full. and I still have to administer it... paperwork is falling farther and farther behind.   It just seems like a lot to do. They want new students to come week after next, and I'm out for an exploratory procedure that week... which makes it silly to bring anyone in. I have so many people contacting me ... when I was out for the day dealing with my closing, 29 people came by or called .. looking for me.  I know the center functioned before I got there... I'm just not sure how.. I have gotten to the point where I want to binge eat again... just to deal with it all.. I need to be very careful with that. I also don't have a clue how to help some of my friends... I know there are issues with them... and some share to a point.. but when it comes down to it... it's really none of my business.  I think we all live in our own little world... and for the most part, we don't share much of that world with anyone else... I don't think most know how.  I like to care about what's going on with people in my life... but when it comes down to it... I'm pretty helpless to do anything for anyone else... I'm even floundering with being able to help myself. I still worry about people and what's happening though... because I do care. That's another thing that bothers me a bit... I worry about something.. and to be truthful, I don't really know what I'm worrying about... which is ridiculous in itself. I need to retreat back into my own little world and just let people decide if they want me to be a part of their world or not... then I can listen.. maybe offer helpful advice.. but that's pretty much the extent of my power.. Sometimes it a good thing just to be able to share issues with another... so we don't feel like we're so alone..