I Accept Things As They Are.

I started writing this.. this morning.. then updates caused my computer restarted.. then I had to leave... for work.. and just happen to come back to it... so I published it tonight...

Another cold day... another long night's sleep.. I wasn't very tired when I went to bed.. but I slept soundly.. no waking up.. and my eyes popped open at 5 am.. as they usually do. My daughter's birthday was yesterday.  She had her cousin spend the night last night... and they were up later than I was... which is okay, since school is out. I hope it was a fun one for her.

I think they're trying to kill me at work.. on top of all my other stuff I have to do, I was told I needed to help straighten out a mess in trade assignments.. not just my trade.. if that had been it... I would have been fine.. even now.. I'm okay with it.. because I have more justification on why I deserve my outstanding rating.  I will continue to work as diligently as I can.. until I find out my lowered rating will stick... then.. we shall see. As it is now.. I am headed to Nashville today with another staff member in order to make certain that all the students catch their flights.. why me?  ...because they know I'll do it right.  I think I will enjoy my long week off.. after today, I will be off for 9 days straight.. I think that's the most I've ever been off at one time.... or at least in the last 12 years.

I had a strange dream last night.. again of the tall dark lady.. still don't know who she is... and the strange part about the dream was... I just woke up... and saw her lying in my bed.. sleeping.. I don't even think that was erotic.. it was just natural.. I didn't wake her up.. and ended up getting ready for work and leaving.. I haven't a clue who she is... because I know I'd recognize her if I had seen her before. This dream was quite as vivid as the one before... but it was pretty memorable.. even as ordinary dreams go.

I am seeing a difference in my weight loss.... and now.. it's not even about losing the weight.. it's about feeling healthy.. I'm sleeping better.. I am feeling better.. and I think maybe my whole mental outlook is a bit healthier.  No... I'm not becoming less cynical about relationships.. I still know I will never trust anyone again.. but I am fine being that way... I accept things as they are.

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